There is a reason why California became important in my life. I detest it for it has caged the opportunities I may be having else where. I like it for the lovely beaches and long roads. The 24 hrs I have in a day are spent in thinking of how to make a living in California. Getting into a residency program there is close to impossible for immigrants. But it’s hard to make people understand this. Very very hard.

Is it pointless to think so much, I also think. And then I have a good tearful laugh. For I remember I had wings long back. They were transparent. And made a nice noise when they fluttered. But I still want to fly away. Fly far far away where I have nothing but solitude. The emptiness and nothingness of the universe to blanket me and keep me warm, for that is the only thing that makes sense to me now. And keeps me happy too ( apart from the smell of henna in my hair )

I try not to hate. I try being divine and not human.

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